What we value in many ways determine our lives. I’ve written before about how to determine what your core values are. This time we’ll take it a step further.
When I work one on one with my clients we unpack their top 3-5 values and how to actually use the awareness around these values in how they live their lives to get the results they want. Because your values are not what you think you want. It’s what you actually want and it influences both your behaviour and your results.
What I’ve noticed in the many values unpacks I’ve done over the past few years is that there are some key ones that recur for most people (it’s mainly the order of them that varies a bit). Family, growth, health, stability, learning, teaching and travelling keep are among the most common ones I see, but there is one core one that is a bit of an enigma to truly live resourcefully. It’s freedom.
Values can be difficult to define, because every individual will attribute different meanings to the same word. Talking about freedom as a core value though, there are some things to consider:
- Responsibility: Some people who value freedom will have a complicated relationship with responsibility for self and other. A resourceful freedom fighter will take responsibility for their actions and their role in the wider world. Some people who value freedom will try and use it as an excuse to run away and not have to deal with things.
- Choice: Freedom is often closely connected to the ability to choose your life and experiences to some extent. Even a non-choice (staying the same or not actively changing something) is a choice. If freedom is high on your list, have a think about how you feel about the concept of choice.
- Commitment: Somewhat connected to responsibility, but a value in it’s own right. People who value freedom can sometimes struggle to commit to people and situations, but they will also be very loyal to anyone who fully allows them to be who they are.
- Tribe: Possibly the most important angle to consider. Freedom can sometimes be something achieved on your own, but as social beings we all need to belong to some kind of social context or tribe. Valuing freedom highly can sometimes exclude the people we love and care about. Often people who value freedom can feel sad at times that it seems to come at the prize of loneliness. It does not have to!
Freedom is a beautiful thing and if you were born in a part of the world that fully allows you to live your path – you’re pretty lucky! The biggest thing for all the freedom fighters out there to resourcefully love and build freedom is to find the sweet spot where your need for freedom connects you closely with your tribe. That can be via your family, career, studies, hobbies, friends or partner.
Because everybody needs a buddy. Freedom is a team sport and with the right team around you, you’ll most likely have more freedom than if you stay on your own.
What’s been your experience around the value and concept of freedom?