It’s time to lift our game. We already know that most people are better at articulating what they don’t want than what they do want. We also know that well over 95% of people in this world choose ‘good’ over ‘great’. Regularly and in many areas of their life. Very few people are willing to push through from comfort and ‘making do’ to reach beyond to what is truly great. Today’s post is not for the fain hearted, so if you’re a person who is quite happy with things exactly the way they are right now, then simply enjoy what you have and move on to read something else.
If you’re not completely happy with where you are right now in all areas of your life (this is unfortunately true for most of us!) then keep reading. Chances are that you’re settling in one (or a few) areas of your life. As normal as this is, it’s also worth having a much closer look at.
Most of my adult life I’ve been fascinated by personal development, especially when linked to performance. And early on in my coaching studies I was introduced to the enemy of great success and happiness. Some call it ‘comfort’ and others call it ‘good enough’. In my mind it’s the major difference between good and great. I don’t mind what you choose to call it, as long as you understand how important this is for your decisions now and in days to come.
One of my mentors always says “you’re either green and growing or ripe and rotting“. Growth lives in a space of stretching from your comfort zone and into your learning zone (granted sometimes this means gentle stretching over a period of time). Growth however does not live on your couch in comfy tracksuit pants and with a tub full of chocolate.
Depending on who you are and what your current vision is, you’ll have different views and thoughts on what’s good and what’s great. Right now you might be thinking about a specific area in your life like your career or your intimate relationship with someone. It does not really matter as long as you are able to be honest with yourself and see and tune into that distinction within yourself. Because good and great can never be the same thing.
What then can you do right now to start moving from good to great in your life, regardless where in the world you live? Follow these four simple truths about real life decision making:
- It’s much more compelling to move towards something we truly want, than to move away from what we don’t want. Think about it. You can run fast away from a great danger (scary looking animal chasing you), but you can run equally fast towards something you really want (a hug from a loved one you have not seen for a long time). Which one makes you feel better inside? And which one would you run further for? Make decisions to move towards what you want as your primary focus!
- You owe yourself to have a vision! To be able to drive your own bus you must have an idea of where you are going. The clearer that picture is, the more likely you’ll get there. With a blurry picture it’s easier to get lost on the way and return home to comfort. If you need help filling in this vision and feeling of where you are heading you can contact me for a free chat to get you started.
- There is a big difference between acceptance and resignation. True self love comes from choosing yourself and to step up for yourself. Sometimes we need to accept things that are, but more often clients come to me and are upset or sad about how things did not turn out the way they wanted or hoped for. Sometimes when we choose comfort it often means choosing others ahead of ourselves. So many people choose to resign to things that happen to them and hold them back from a great and compelling future.
- The unconscious mind never sleeps. Your conscious mind can only process a very limited amount of information, but you unconscious mind always listens. Most people are not aware of this, but think of it as a small child. It watches you, listens to you and feels with you. When you choose others dreams instead of your own and tell yourself that it’s not possible, the inner child slumps and eventually accepts that ‘it will never happen for me‘. When you believe in yourself and walk your talk, the child stands tall and follows you proudly. Sometimes we might find ourself stuck in a rut, but that’s when we can choose to make different decisions to allow that kid to come out and play. Learn to feed your mind with belief rather than putting yourself down.
- Sometimes we need to say no. The common misunderstanding seems to be that when you walk your path to true greatness you have to say yes to everything that comes your way. Far som it. Really successful people say yes to some things (that will help them learn, grow, having fun, experience and get a new perspective), but they say no to lots of things (anything that’s wasting time and energy on people and situations who no longer serve them or have no contribution to to greatness they are creating). Saying no to others is sometimes the best way to say yes to yourself.
- True greatness is ecological. It’s great for you, those around you and the greater good. Sounds impossible? It most certainly is not. Successful people on their path to greatness have a great relationship with themselves and the people around them and their path to greatness also plays a part in the greater good of the world around them. Your greatness must involve others on some level, otherwise you will find yourself feeling lonely, misunderstood and your human need for connection will start to thrown spanners in the works.
I truly believe that greatness is within the reach of anyone willing to spend the time to define it, map it out and take action towards it. Now I pass it over to you – will you choose consciously to move towards your definition of greatness?